For 6 weeks this summer, I had doctor’s orders to save my bullets. So save my bullets I did! I didn’t run or jump or lift any heavy things for 47 days. I decided to see what would happen to my 3 year old nagging injury if I actually stopped and let it heal. It had gotten so bad I hadn’t slept through the night in months so I suppose this is what you might call, le bottom du rock. So I iced and wore my hideous compression sock and rolled, rolled, rolled those tight calves like it was my job. Well, because it was my actual job.
- The first week was fun! I had fun instagramming me icing my foot in weird places, like the Pacific Ocean and on patios drinking beers with friends. Rest-Day brags to the max. The thrice-daily icing regime novelty wore off pretty quick tho’.
- Pain (mostly) went away. I know, I know, it seems totally unbelievable! But I’m here to tell you that if you stop poking the bear, the bear goes to sleep. It’s science.
- I had so much extra time. Working out takes up time and when you don’t do it, you have so. much. time. It was at once great and also horrible. (see #6).
- Less laundry.
- Fragile ego became damaged. My body changed. Not that much but enough that I felt different in my body. I lost strength and muscle and felt sluggish. Also, I can’t do as many push-ups which is no bueno for fragile ego.
- I became less funny. When you’re literally as funny as I am, some might not notice if I became slightly less hilarious. How did I get less funny, albeit temporarily? Exercise keeps me balanced and without it, no amount of reading, painting or watching movies could quell the cacophony of noise in my head. And I just about lost my fucking mind.
Bless my darling orthopedic surgeon (I’m sure he went to medical school to be referred to as ‘darling’ by a 40-something stay at home mom with foot pain) for finally clearing me to exercise a little*. The swelling was down and pain was way down so… YES!!!!! I can exercise again!! Oh the JOY! So this story is going to have a happy ending after all!
I’m not crying, you’re crying.
*As long as it’s on non-consecutive days, no weight bearing, no impact, no increase in swelling and no pain. Seems easy?